Seeing as it is Christmas I will allow my blog post to stray from anything physiotherapy related to the more personal. Well, at least I’ll try. After all, once a physio always a physio.
Since becoming a parent Christmas has taken on a very different meaning. I no longer think or care about what’s under the tree for me. In fact, I really don’t need or want anything. All that matters now is seeing the delight and wonder on my children’s faces. The look on their faces when they saw that their Christmas elves had returned again this year was priceless. His joy when my son saw that his elf had answered his call for new Christmas pyjamas in time for the party at the daycare could bring a tear to your eye.
In this day of excessive material possessions I struggle with striking a balance with my kids in terms of them understanding giving as much as receiving, getting stuff as much as enjoying experiences, and relaxing as much as being excited. For me the season should be all about the wonder and magic and not so much about toys. This is probably the biggest challenge of the season for us as a family.
I grew up with lots of stuff. I remember Christmas morning being a positive gluttony of gifts from all kinds of friends and family members. Paper and ribbons were strewn all over the floor so that walking became an exercise requiring a waiver. What I remember most though, was the fun I had playing with all of my cousins at my grandmother’s house in the evening. I can count on one hand the number of gifts I received that I actually remember, and those were ones that promoted exploration and imagination. I guess it’s no surprise given my career choice that the one most memorable gift ever was a microscope. I can still see it in its real wooden case complete with slides of neat stuff to look at. I guess I was a budding scientist even then.
So how to strike a balance with my kids now? Well, we emphasize giving throughout the year and not just at Christmas. When the kids have outgrown toys we don’t just take them away. We make sure the kids know they are going to someone else who will appreciate them. Just before Christmas we went through their toys and purged, explaining to them that Santa would be bringing new things so we should pass some of their old things on to kids who don’t have many toys. I want them to understand that there are children who don’t have much, not because I want them to feel privileged, but because I want them to understand that giving something can make them just as happy as receiving.
One of the other things we try to do is ask people not to buy lots of things for the kids, but rather to take them on a special outing. I have a client who gives her children experiences rather than material things at birthdays and Christmas, such as tickets to a show, or a family adventure outing. I absolutely love this idea and would like to incorporate it more as the kids get older. This holiday season I bought us tickets to go see a children’s show together. I know they will love it and will talk about it for months, long after the toys they have received have been relegated to the corner to collect dust.
While I do sometimes wish for a bit of tranquility on Christmas day, I know that someday that will come. For now, I wouldn’t trade the chaos that comes with a family with two small children for anything as long as we remember that the magic and just being together is what is important.
With warmth and kindness from my family to yours on this Christmas day.